Heather Pound

Half-mast and underfed,

I wonder why we frequently

try to live with a diet that

is close to starvation from

the things that truly fill the

bellies of our soul. The food we

require is available and closer

than we think, yet we seek

to live life on rations of crumbs,

famished by distraction,

undernourished at the core

~~~~

Eat of the goodness of life,

that which sustains

While frivolity, excitement,

the pursuit of pleasure,

and things deemed ‘success’

are treats that taste fine;

the food that nourishes

and keeps us alive

is the simple fare found

in daily routines and things

that we can easily mistake

for ‘boring’ or ‘ordinary’

~~~~

Yet without a diet

based on substance

we quickly fade to a shadow

of who we really are and

live wondering why

‘flourish’ is something

we never quite manage

~~~~

After all, would you hold your

breath or breathe shallow

searching for the scent

of something fine

when the fresh air around  

is clean and always in supply?

——–Biology 101

~~~~

©Heather Pound 2021

I looked around the place that I was in
Nothing there but bleak, hostile, bare
not a place to build a home
or even unpack a bag
so I began to cross
one step at a time
shaking and quivering
across that flimsy bridge
Because sometimes when you’re desperate
even something shaky and unknown
is preferable to where you have been

But a curious thing began to happen
with each cautious step
I found that the bridge was stronger than I thought
and grew more substantial with each step

Or rather, each uttered word
And the woman sitting across from me listened
with such an empathetic heart

without a flicker of judgement 
and with so much kindness in her eyes,
that I told her all that was in my withered soul
mascara running down my face,

tissues scattered round
And week by week I began to see 
the beauty that was possible on the other side
of that substantial bridge

—This is a memory of the first time I connected with a counsellor. Pursuing counselling takes a huge amount of courage, but as the relationship develops it becomes easier, and quite literally, has changed my life!

©Heather Pound 2021

There he goes again, the little song thrush

that lives up to his name,

singing morning and night this spring

Faithfully waking us with the dawn

and serenading the setting sun,

high up on the spire that decorates

the roof next door, as if he is

the king of the world

~~~~

Not being familiar with the habits of his kind

I am not sure what motivates this routine

Perhaps he aspires to be a rooster instead

but with a more impressive range of tones and trills

that seems to be sung for no other reason

than spring is here, the air is fine,

and life is good

~~~~

And for me this has become a daily

reminder to stop and listen to the contagious joy

of a tiny bird, performing for all he is worth

marking his territory perhaps, but

for no other apparent reason

than simply being alive

~~~~

©Heather Pound 2021

When I lived in the desert I had no respect for cactus

They were everywhere, prickly, even dangerous

if you fell into them whilst catching a ball

This my son knows well

~~~~

I longed for green, famished

soft grass, tall trees, anything different than these

~~~~

But now I dwell where there are shades of green

more hues than even imagined before

enough to daily stop and stare

I relish in this!

~~~~

But wouldn’t you know

the houseplants I now adore

are those same spiny things I couldn’t wait

to get away from

made precious by the simple fact

that I can admire them one by one

individuals, different,

monuments to creativity and protection, and beauty

I faithfully nurture these and rejoice when they respond

~~~~

This makes me question why do we worry

when we’re perceived different?

Because ‘different’ is rare, even treasured

and rare is beautiful

This a diamond knows well

~~~~

©Heather Pound 2021

When you feel heavy or tired

and you don’t know why

it could be that your heart is singing of loss

and begging you to listen

Loss isn’t always obvious

and shouldn’t be compared to how

others may have it worse, or how

it is better than it used to be

~~~~

Loss, is loss, is loss

It just is

So, if your heart is trying to tell you

about something such as this

listen

and then give it a name

It may be something as simple as

loss of connection, or a relationship

or loss of a freedom even though

everything else ‘should’ be fine

~~~~

If we don’t pay attention when asked

that loss swirls–and expands

and bigger and louder becomes,

screaming,

until it is as if we are covered by storm,

dense and dark and threatening

~~~~

Yet if we just take time to notice the loss

and give it a name–it will breathe

It lets the heart and brain

consider the grief together

and soon something that seemed so huge and

swirling and loud and scary

becomes more manageable

So much so that it might even

fit between your two, strong hands

~~~~~~

—We’ve been in lockdown for a while where I live and many people are expressing a heaviness that they can’t shake. Perhaps acknowledging things that we have lost is something that we need right now.

©Heather Pound 2021

One evening we walked a hundred meters or so up our narrow, dirt lane

And climbed three sets of stairs, painted green. We went

Up, up, up past low doorways where women sold their bodies on repeat

At enormous cost to themselves–but for very little change

~~~~

I remember breathing hard because of closed doors, muffled sounds

As I thought of faces that waited outside for business every day

But at the top stood our friend who gladly waved us in

And with a shy but happy smile, she introduced her home

Small room, large wooden bed, a burner, aluminum pots

Clothing for a family of four with everything in its place

And delicious smells floating–while her beloved pet birds sang  

~~~~

But this regal woman was not caged up like her birds

From a life that with no choice began, she was flying free

With women like herself instead she was sewing beautiful things

Uncovering freedom and hope and respect from others

–And choice and dignity

~~~~

She served us curry, rice and dahl

Scooping up nourishment, flavored with love

A celebration of her daughter’s birthday, one more year

In a life that included radical things, like education and enough food

And a freedom as a young woman–that her mother never knew

~~~~

This scene, forever frozen in my heart and in my mind

Because while I have feasted on crystal

Tables precisely covered in linen

My water refilled with every sip

While rubbing shoulders with the mighty  

I have never felt more honoured by an invitation than this

Into that humble home, invited in friendship–by her

~~~~~

 —-This very personal poem was difficult to write. It is a memory so precious that I wanted to do it justice. I have also realised that while during those years there we focused on hope, partly because we saw good things happening and partly for our own mental wellbeing, I still have many choked back tears over things that we saw as well. A number of them got to slide down my face as this poem developed.

©Heather Pound 2021

Today I am not tasked to solve all this world’s ills

Today is just a normal day with ordinary things

And to be completely honest on this day I do not think

That I have anything left that is remarkable to give

~~~~

So today I spend my time seeking only simple things  

Moments of beauty, pauses of peace

Like the sound of gentle raindrops pat-patting on fresh grass

The salty smell of wind as it blows in off the sea

Or sitting in companionable silence with someone that I love

~~~~

It is in these ordinary ways, on normal routine days

That show us who we are and what we’ll be

What habits do we cultivate, what values do we hold

What will we do with passions and with time

These simple things assembled are how we spend our days

And in the end, they’re how we’ll live our lives

~~~~

Don’t underestimate the power of an ordinary life

For every person who has done extraordinary things

Has still lived their life daily one humdrum moment a time

With many days consisting of just normal, average things

~~~~

–simple and faithful is how to change the world.

©Heather Pound 2021

“Everybody wants a revolution. But no-one wants to do the dishes.” -Craig Greenfield

The place where our souls find rest

Space and peace in the middle of the storm

It’s a destination of value and seeking it is

Of more worth than things like

Pleasing others, popularity, or fame

~~~~

There is power in the ‘calm’

It does not mean that you have all the answers

Or that you don’t care deeply for the needs of others

It is not withdrawn

It is simply a space in our souls that stays in the present

And gives voice to things

Like creativity and peace

~~~~

—–and don’t we need a bit more of that in our world?

©Heather Pound 2021